December 10, 2003

Holidays
by: EJ

Its supposed to be a family thing,

A happy occasion,

And full of love,

This isn't true for me,

I hate these occasions with a passion,

This is odd to most people,

But they don't understand how it feels,

TO have your life torn apart,

To have your family split in half,

They don't understand how complicated it is,

To work things out,

First you have Christmas at your house,

Then you go to dad's house,

And in the process of leaving,

I can see the pain in my mother's eyes,

Her wishing things didn't happen the way they did,

Can she see the pain I'm in?

I hate having to go to two places,

I wish I could wake up in the morning,

And have the whole family there,

And eat breakfast together like a normal family,

But it can't happen because we're not normal,

Every holiday reminds me of this,

And each time it breaks my heart,

Maybe one day I'll get used to this,

But I know it won't be anytime soon.

December 10, 2003

Hallways
by: EJ

Silent one minute,

The next erupting in noise,

These hallways feel so empty,

Each long and endless,

Each connecting to make this huge maze,

Its quite probable to get lost here,

I often do,

Sometimes I do it accidentally on purpose,

Its amazing how things contradict themselves here,

Eve the most familiar faces,

Can feel like complete strangers to me,

Not because their personalities have changed,

But because all of this world is still new to me,

This is not my original home,

I feel alone in this silence,

Yet the noise is overwhelming,

Whenever I get lost in these halls,

The truth still manages to find me,

I am not alone, this is my new home,

I belong here, I am better here,

Even though the crowd in the hallways seem impassible,

One person at a time I am managing to breaky my way through,

One step at a time my path gets clearer,

Now I can see where I'm heading in my life,

I am happy.

August 31, 2003

Highway
by: EJ

Life is like driving on a highway,

Sometimes you're moving so fast,

And you can't slow down,

Other times you're at a dead stop,

Stuck in a traffic jam,

Currently I feel like I'm in a Nascar race,

Wheels turning for miles on end,

Seems like it will never stop,

When will I see the checkered flag,

Or even the caution-slow down car,

What about a pit stop,

Time is going by way too fast,

My body and mind can't handle this pace,

Constantly on the go,

Everything is just a blur,

I look back to three years ago,

And I feel as if it was literally yesterday,

Where did all the time go,

I'm scare now,

That I won't get everything done this year,

College seems so far away,

But really its just around the next bend in the road,

Well all I can do for now,

Is just keep on driving.

August 3, 2003

Love-Hate
by: EJ

Anger and frustration,

Lies and betrayals,

Is it a love-hate relationship,

I don't really think so,

We're supposed to be friends now,

But when one constantly loves,

And the other constantly hates,

Things don't seem to work,

But really the truth is,

Nothing works out when its based on lies,

If you really love someone,

You'll be honest and truthful,

Even if it is brutal,

The one who loves,

Doesn't really know what love is,

They've never been shown real love,

The one who hates,

Does it out of love,

But not necessarily romantic love,

Just simply caring for them,

Things aren't going to work out with these two,

So its time to put up the white flag,

And call it quits,

An end to the anger and frustration,

Enough is enough.

August 2, 2003

Content
by: EJ

Busy, Busy, Busy,

Always on the go,

Not much time to think,

Body racing,

Mind pacing,

Trying to stay in balance,

Time to write,

Time to listen,

Two words,

Blogger and music,

Helping me to drown the world out,

Less craziness,

Settling down,

Time to think,

Figuring things out,

Peace of mind,

Content.

May 11, 2003

Anata ga daiskides ("I Love You", in Japanese)
by: EJ

Not a day has gone by,

That I haven't thought about you,

You're on my mind constantly,

You're so beautiful to me,

Body and soul,

Everytime the phone rings,

I hope its you,

Everytime I see you,

My heart skips a beat,

Whenever I'm able to look into your eyes,

My heart begins to race a mile a minute,

I was totally oblivious in the past,

I never expected to be where I am now,

I suppose its true what they say,

Love does move in mysterious ways,

You make me so incredibly happy,

I love hearing your voice,

I love just seeing your handwriting,

Just seeing you, being with you, and thinking of you,

Makes my day, everyday,

I love spending all of this time with you,

I want to spend forever with you,

I want to make your dreams come true,

I want to be perfect for you,

Cause baby you really are worth it.